Lobby Bar – May 12: In-Flight Scuffles, Bette Midler Tries Rapping, and How to Become Famous

The Lobby Bar – A Mellifluous Melody of Travel News and Reviews, Now in E Flat

Animals matter. Join Jonathan Spira at the Samuel J. Friedman Theatre for “The Little Foxes,” a play that is not about foxes at all. The play’s original title “Grumpy Old White Ladies,” more accurately described the plot, but ended alienating audience members. Due to the play’s revised title, however, foxes and their friends have all but boycotted the new performance.

Raptacular. The votes are in, and “Come From Away” and “Hello, Dolly!” swept the 2017 Outer Critics Circle Awards. Bette Midler told us that she returned to Broadway to settle a long-standing rivalry for garnering the most awards between her and Meryl Streep. Unfortunately, she isn’t catching up fast enough, and will be exploring new avenues for awards including being featured on Kanye West’s new album.

Super shield. Jeremy Del Nero (ahoy!) has some tips on how you can protect your privacy online. We’ve found some lovely caves for rent off the shore of Norway where you can effectively shield yourself from Wi-Fi, Bluetooth, NFC, GPS, unhappy foxes, and, most importantly, human beings.

Proper care. Let’s visit the Hyatt at the Bellevue in Philadelphia, where we can kick back, relax, and not catch a deadly virus. To prevent future outbreaks of Legionnaires’ Disease, the hotel pumps a powerful antibody (that smells like cinnamon) through the air vents into all of the guest rooms, so be sure you can smell cinnamon at all times or you may be susceptible to infection.

Do it for the fame. Join us back at the Ethel Barrymore Theatre for “Six Degrees of Separation.” Remember, by knowing us and reading FBT, you’re only separated by two degrees from the actors on stage, which basically makes you quite famous. In other words, consider quitting your job and pursuing a career as an Instagram influencer.

Revenge plot. To add to a series of airline scuffles, a passenger fight broke out this week on a Southwest flight. The altercation began when one of the passengers refused to get up to let a window-seater use the restroom, and the latter decided to relieve himself on the other’s phone. Thankfully, the water-resistant Samsung Galaxy S8 was not damaged.

(Photo: Accura Media Group)