Lobby Bar – December 29: Banana Disasters, Stupid Luggage, and Drunk Butlers

By Jeremy Del Nero on 29 December 2017
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Lobby Bar – Enjoy With a Half-glass of Egg Nog

Dead pixels. With the New Year approaching, we’ve prepared a few good resolutions for the frequent traveler to live by. We’re partial to 3840 × 2160, but 1920 x 1080 is also a good choice.

Six shots, please. It wouldn’t be New Year’s Eve without continuing the tradition of viewing “Dinner for One.”  This year you can strap on a pair of VR goggles and sit next to a virtual Miss Sophie, choosing to play the role of any of her imaginary guests (Mr. Pomeroy, anyone?), or, if you should be so bold and thirsty, James the butler.

Come with me. Join us for a look back at 2017 and the most popular stories of the past year. This year we’re offering two methods of reliving the top articles: read the roundup article or take a trip in Jesse’s time machine to visit each story and experience them in real time. The latter method costs a nickel and may take up to two weeks to experience, so make sure you’ve got some vacation time saved up.

Don’t stay cool. If you haven’t felt the cold snap this week, it’s probably because you’re already numb from the below-freezing temperatures. Consider dressing in layers, or hiring FBT senior correspondent Anna Breuer to follow you around with aircraft de-icing fluid. To be clear, you’ll need to pay her airfare.

Fruitless. A JetBlue flight skidded on the runway upon landing at Boston’s Logan Airport this week. The skid occurred after a snacking air marshal carelessly tossed a banana peel over his shoulder, which landed precisely where JetBlue’s Airbus touched down. The marshal will be given a second chance, President Trump fired the banana peel effective immediately.  Rumors that the FOBP (Fraternal Order of Banana Peels) plans to sue the President for wrongful termination could not be confirmed by press time.

Dumb bags. An increasing number of U.S. airlines have announced plans to discontinue allowing passengers to check smart luggage. From here on out, the TSA will be administering IQ tests to all checked luggage and any bags that score higher than a 0 will not be allowed to fly.

(Photo: Accura Media Group)

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