Lobby Bar – December 16: Impersonating Flight Attendants, Copyrighted Vegetables, and Why Magnets are the Answer

By Jeremy Del Nero on 16 December 2016
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A Hysterically Hilarious Recollection of FBT News and Views

One of us. Join Jonathan Spira at the Music Box Theater for a musical for the Facebook Generation: “Dear Evan Hansen” and stay after the show for the sequel, “Dear Paul Riegler.” Like Evan, Paul is a troubled lad who can’t seem to make a social connection with anyone at school due to his awkward nature. Learn the story about the misfit who was destined join the ranks at Frequent Business Traveler.

Sticky Moto. Come with Jeremy Del Nero (hey!, that’s me) for an inside scoop on the Motorola Moto Z Force Droid Edition, the world’s first modular smartphone. It comes with all kinds of great magnetic mods, such as battery- and camera-enhancing attachments, as well as some more practical ones: the chair mod is incredibly convenient when you can’t find a seat on the subway and the water bottle mod comes in handy to quench your thirst in a pinch.

Hand in hand. We beseech you: put winter tires on your car. If that sentence isn’t enough for you, read our article highlighting the many reasons why it’s a good idea to swap your tires out whenever you adjust your clocks. Just don’t take the habit too far: Last week when Paul Riegler flew to Los Angeles and had to change the time on his wristwatch, he was halfway done with changing his tires before Jesse slapped some sense into him.

Don’t lose me. The holidays are upon us and it’s no secret that traveling during this time of year can be a stressful and trying endeavor. Check out Jesse’s tips for how not to lose your stuff or your mind whilst traveling. If you own a Moto Z, the solution is simple: just glue strong magnets to your luggage, and be stuck to your rear pocket for the duration of your trip.

Million-dollar idea. It’s time to get some diamond gifts for the diamond guest in your life. We recommend getting your friend or loved one a nice new Boeing Dreamliner, fresh off the assembly line. You may also want to buy a new hangar for the recipient so he or she can fit their new present under the tree.

Dress up party. British Airways cabin crew are planning a strike for Christmas week. If you still want to fly, your best bet is to purchase some BA livery online, dress up as a flight attendant, and try to convince the airline to let you serve beverages and not cancel the flight.

Renaming vegetables. This week, Lufthansa announced that it would acquire the 55% of Brussels Airlines it does not already own. The airline will now own the Brussels name, and will soon begin filing for a motion to have all Brussels sprouts in the world renamed to “Lufthansa Sprouts.” Top FBT lawyers say there’s nothing that can stop the airline from exacting royalties from vegetable stands across the globe.

(Photo: Accura Media Group)

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