Lobby Bar – September 25: Papamania, iSmash Phones, and Pastafarian Planes

By Jeremy Del Nero on 25 September 2015
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Lobby Bar –A Summary of FBT News and Views, Written by Monkeys

P is for Pope. You better watch out, you better not cry – the pope is coming to town. Papa’s visit to New York City is expected to shut down the east half of the island as well as many first-day iPhone deliveries, putting the pope at a ranking just a hair less catastrophic than Hurricane Sandy.

Mall rats. Join Jesse Sokolow for a tour of Washington D.C. Your first stop should be the National Mall, a museum of defunct department stores, where you can find a Gimbels, Abraham & Straus, Comp USA, Woolworths, Crazy Eddie, Castro Convertibles, and other defunct retailers, all accessible via an underground passageway in the National Gallery’s West Building. Keep looking, you’ll find it.

Sleep tight. If you think the soft glow of your shiny new iPhone’s LED screen is helping you fall asleep at night, think again. Paul Riegler shares some key tips for getting to sleep, including smashing your smartphone with a hammer after brushing your teeth. Although this method can be a bit costly, it’s also a great way to be rid of distractions and even relieves some stress before the lights go out.

Heaven sent watches. Strap on the Apple Watch as we test out WatchOS 2’s newest features. Finally, Apple has unlocked the “Digital Crown” feature, which temporarily beams a holographic halo above the wearer’s head. Aphrodite would be proud.

Proximity finances. Coming October 1, most credit card terminals in the United States will be officially converted to accept the more secure chip embedded EMV cards. These terminals should also accept Apple Pay and Google Wallet, so if you complete your transaction near someone talking on his phone at just the right moment, you might be able to get them to unwittingly pay for your purchase.

Coffinance. Jonathan Spira pours himself a cup of coffee made with a Technivorm Moccamaster KBG-741. The only question is, will you pay the $300 premium for the machine, or will you pay the equivalent of four college tuitions to get a Venti Mocha Latte at Starbucks every day for the rest of your life?

Infinity Mpg. The EPA ordered Volkswagen and Audi to recall half a million vehicles after the car companies reportedly shipped the autos with inaccurate fuel economy and emissions ratings. Apparently conducting the tests while the car is in neutral going downhill isn’t entirely honest.

Carb diet. Alitalia’s CEO resigned last week. Apparently Silvano Cassano wanted to take the airline in a different direction: he thought that Alitalia jets should be converted to run on pasta. “It works for me,” he said in a statement, “why shouldn’t it work for my fleet?” He resigned a week later.

(Photo: Accura Media Group)

Accura News

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