Lobby Bar – July 18: Foul Play, Kissin’ Cousins, Unlimited Shipping Weight, and Interwebs Everywhere

By Jeremy Del Nero on 18 July 2014
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The Lobby Bar – An Irreverent Weekly Summary of Frequent Business Traveler News and Views

Conspiracy theory #574.  David Goldes drove the 2014 Mercedes-Benz E250 BluTec 3,500 miles over the past six months and has some stellar fuel economy figures to report.  The Benz might have performed even better had it not been sabotaged by shreds of lumber, which suspiciously fell of the back of a gasoline-powered vehicle.  Coincidence?  I think not.

Who-dun-it?  Jonathan Spira stays in the century-old Claridge’s hotel in London and finds himself in the midst of a murder mystery.  Having won Mr. Spira over with excellent service, the butler kindly asks his guest to provide him with an alibi.  Ginger tea certainly goes a long way.

Vast, pristine emptiness.  Just because Alaska is mostly cold and sparsely populated doesn’t mean there aren’t a few things to do here and there.  At 300,000, the state has almost as many inhabitants as my Brooklyn apartment building.

Just try to unplug.  For the times when you want to avoid a $24,000 bill for roaming, may the Xcom Global mobile hotspot serve as your connection to the vast web whilst you travel the world.  Much like with a spider web; once you are ensnared you cannot escape its clutches.

Might need a bigger home.  Kisses were exchanged freely at the Farnborough International Airshow in England.  One Global Air executive mixed up an order however, and ended up shipping a six-pack of Hanes white T-shirts to the hangar while a brand new Boeing 777X arrived at his apartment in Queens.  That required a really big brown truck.

Disaster in the air.  A Malaysia Airlines jet was apparently shot down over eastern Ukraine on Thursday.  One thing’s certain: the butler had no role in this tragedy.  Our hearts go out to the victims and their families, as well as to the troubled airline.

Strongly indifferent.  How satisfied are frequent flyers with their ability to redeem award flights with their hard-earned miles?  Find out in our latest poll results story, where the apathetic fliers were finally able to express their ambivalence, with feeling, thanks to our new poll options.

Nothing but the truth. Lobby Bar is usually reserved for bending the truth to inject a little humor into the news, but this entry needs no embellishment. On two separate accounts of public drunkenness, one man allegedly impersonated a security officer and administered illegal pat downs to at least two women, while another reportedly made violent threats directed at flight attendants.

(Photo: Accura Media Group)

Accura News

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