Lobby Bar – May 15: Shakespeare, Dark Shadows, and Hungarian Horntails

By Daniel Berg on 16 May 2014
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The Lobby Bar – An Irreverent Weekly Summary of Frequent Business Traveler News and Views

Mother of Dragons. American Airlines retired its last Boeing 767-200 as part of the switchover to smaller, narrow-bodied dragons. “Dragons are more fuel-efficient, aesthetically pleasing, and frankly, they’re in right now”, said Daenerys Targaryen, a spokesperson for the airline.

Slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. Karin Sun visits Copenhagen and takes a ride in Jesse’s time machine to spend an evening at the 1841 Christiansborg Palace Ball with Hans Christian Andersen. She does meet a prince, and quickly finds herself in a whodunit where she is mistaken for someone named Gertrude and ends up marrying someone named Claudius.

Dan’s Macabre – Daniel Berg attempts to report on the restoration of a ferry route between Nova Scotia and Portland, Maine, which once en route transforms itself into a lobster-fishing schooner with a crew of werewolves, zombies, witches, and warlocks, and a new destination of Collinsport, Maine.  Once there, Daniel meets Count Petofi, who shares with him the secret of immortality first discovered by the Count of St. Germain, rendering the need for future voyages with Jesse’s time machine somewhat unnecessary.

You’re gonna make it after all. Jonathan Spira steps into a Porsche to transfer between flights at Minneapolis and is surprised to find a spunky female driver who repeatedly tosses her hat up in the air. The only problem he encounters is that his chauffeur mistakes him for someone named Lou Grant and somehow he ends up flying to Los Angeles and becoming the editor of a newspaper.

At Cruising Altitude. Paul Riegler flies first class to Denver to see the Rockies. The flight is quite lovely, but he is slightly taken aback when instead of the usual safety presentation, the crew breaks out in a karaoke rendition of Rocky Mountain High instead.

The Deer Hunter. Jonathan Spira takes the brand new 2015 Volkswagen Golf TDI for a drive in the Bay Area, where he nearly hits a deer. While he claims the car’s superior brakes prevented the tragedy at the last minute, news reports that Bambi’s mother has been missing for over 24 hours have raised the other editors’ suspicions.

This Lobby Bar included attempts at humor from Karin Sun, Jeremy Del Nero, Paul Riegler, and Jonathan Spira.

(Photo: Accura Media Group)

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